When the forces collide

Nothing feels better then to stand in the face of temptation and to tell Satan to kiss your butt. Romans Chapter 5:3-5 says this:
^3-5There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!


I actually decided today that when things are hard, I feel like I can't do it, life is pressing in on me from all sides. I am thankful! Because through these trials and temptations I will develop some amazing perseverance and character in God, my hope is in Him! So Satan, bring it on cuz you can kiss my butt.


Worth the read: "Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream- RADICAL" by David Platt. Here is a quote from the book that especially got to me! This is about the cost of true discipleship:
"Based on what we have heard from Jesus in the Gospels, we would have to agree that the cost of discipleship is great, But I wonder if the cost of nondiscipleship is even greater.


The price is certainly high for people who don't know Christ and who live in a world where Christians shrink back from self-denying faith and settle into self-indulging faith. While Christians choose to spend their lives fulfilling the American dream instead of giving their lives to proclaiming the kingdom of God, literally billions in need of the gospel remain in the dark."......


"The price of our nondiscipleship is high for those without Christ. It is high also for the poor of this world. Consider the cost when Christians ignore Jesus' commands to sell their possessions and give to the poor and instead choose to spend their resources on better comforts, larger homes, nicer cars, and more stuff. Consider the cost when these Christians gather in churches and choose to spend millions of dollars on nice buildings to drive up to, cushioned chairs to sit in, and endless programs to enjoy for themselves. Consider the cost for the starving multitudes who sit outside the gate of contemporary Christian affluence."


Check out:  notalways.live58.org

Just Life!

Today consisted of gathering papers for grant applications, running errands up to the church and around town, lunch at Culvers with mom and the kids, playing at the playground, a walmart grocery trip (always to be dreaded!) and coming home to cook dinner, play with the kids, clean up the house (again!) and get everybody clean and in bed. Whew, the days are always long but I wish there were more hours in them to get more done. I really need to learn how to become one of those people that gets up at 5 am. I did manage to get two more grant applications done and in the mail today so that my friend was progress! Prayed on the way to walmart for all the things on my mind to include the campers this week, my hubby as he goes to a second week of camp, and of course our Akwasi, across the ocean and waiting on his family. I'm learning how to pray no matter what I'm doing, consistently and fervently! 

I'm so glad mom is here to visit, it is so fun to see the kids get excited over family being here. It is a mix of emotions though because I know she is leaving in a few days. It's getting harder for me to be ok with the kids growing up without grandparents close by. I grew up pretty close to my grandparents and saw them every Sunday at church at the very least. We spent weekends at their house in the summer. I have so many amazing memories of those times. It's kinda funny how as much as family can drive you nuts you would still really like to have them near you!

God reminded me of something this morning. Even when I'm sleeping, God is speaking to me, guiding me along, and I know He isn't going to leave me. 

Psalm 16:5-7

New International Version (NIV)

 ⁵ LORD, you alone are my portion and my cup;
   you make my lot secure.
⁶ The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
   surely I have a delightful inheritance.
⁷ I will praise the LORD, who counsels me;
   even at night my heart instructs me.

When nothing else in life makes sense, I know that God is all I need  and I am so in love with Him!

Waiting Waiting Waiting

Let the 90 day wait for a court date begin! Almost....! Our Dossier is in the hands of the Ghana director who will take it to the Ghanaian court any day now! Time feels like it is going backwards! We have plenty to do while we wait though, because over the next 3 months we need to come up with about $18,000. Yeah I know some of you are thinking, "wow I can't believe she just told us how much they have to come up with", well welcome to the realities of adoption! Let me just say that is only a portion of what we have to come up with total....and a lot of people in this world spend that much on a vehicle and everybody knows it based on what they choose to drive. It ain't no secret! I also have a motive for telling you because I know that God is going to provide in a miraculous way, and when He provides in one year nearly what we make in a year for us to bring home our precious Akwasi, I want GOD alone to receive all the credit! I have seen the fig tree wither (read the book of Matthew!) and I know what God can do! Now I am telling that mountain that stands in the way of us and our son, to HURL itself into the sea. He will do it! I have faith enough that I believe I will see that mountain (for us the mountain is money...or lack of it! ha!) start moving and plummet to the bottom of the depths of the ocean and then the path will be clear!

Meanwhile, while God works, please pray for us! We are applying for grants, and praying like crazy. I have kidney surgery in July (small operation, but still an overnight stay...ick) and I need your prayers for quick amazing healing afterwards and for our kids while we are gone to Sioux Falls for the surgery. God is good, he healed my kidney for several years I have been able to live with a problem that should have been operated on in 2007, but now that our babies are no longer babies, I can get the problem fixed and live completely pain-free (thank you Jesus for doctors and their wisdom at necessary times!).

Please pray for Jeremey at High School camp this week. Pray that God rocks each of the students lives, literally shakes them upside down and makes sense of His Will for each of their lives! Pray that students receive him, get filled with the spirit, get healed, get delivered, and get called into ministry for life. Pray for the leaders, the speaker, the band, and the camp staff.

In my life as of late, I have realized something huge! I always thought my time was my own. Like something that belonged to me and I can do with it what I please. Well...WAKE UP CALL! God spoke to me this week that "MY TIME" is not my time! It's His time that He has given me. Each day I live and move and have breath because of him! So it's not fair for me to be selfish with it. Will I spend more time with God today than I spent in front of the mirror? Will I allow myself to be completely inconvenienced so that I can reach someone, minister to someone, love on someone, when He asks me to? Will I drop what I think is so important to do something for/with my children that He has so richly blessed me with? Will I choose to get up early to bless my husband with breakfast before he walks out the door in the morning? Will I get up in the middle of the night grumbling and complaining over my toddler who still drops her passy and cries for it? I CHOOSE to do all these things with love, with thankfulness, and with a spirit of working my hardest for the Lord who has given me this work to do. I will do it with all my might for HIM. PERSEVERANCE. POWER. PURPOSE. (Bryan Newswanders sermon last night hit on these three points!)

Rainy Sad Day

I am sad today because across the ocean our son is there. Waiting for his family, not even knowing who we are yet, or that we exist. I wonder what he has gotten to eat today, maybe a bowl of rice or beans and yet here we sit with a fridge full of yummy food. I pray he got to drink clean water today, and that he doesn't get hurt or sick, or lice. I hope that someone today was kind to him, and gave him a hug. I want to hug him and hold his tiny dark little hand in mine. I feel like I was born for this, just like I knew I would one day be a mom, I know I was born to be a mom to him. If a white person could have some African in their blood, I must have some in there somewhere. I love the food, the music, the culture. It truly is beautiful. I might not be the perfect mom, I certainly am not the best at figuring out how to discipline...I would much rather just have fun and love on my kids. But I am his mom. And he is our son. Watching the Ugandan orphans last night I could hardly hold back the tears watching them dance and smile, playing their drums. The louder the drums got, the more I had to smile to keep from crying. I got to meet an amazing family who has adopted their precious girl from Ethiopia, and she is the same age as Akwasi. I am so amazed at how God works because they were sitting right behind us. I can't wait to see the two of them play together. I know God's timing is best, and I trust Him.

Philippians 4: in my words

I will not worry about anything, or fret, or lose sleep, because instead I will pray and ask God with a thankful heart for what it is that we need. All things, spiritual and tangible will I lay at His feet and when I leave them there I have peace that no man can understand! In the midst of problems, financial strife, illness, confusion, whatever satan may throw at me, I leave them with God and He settles me down!

I will think on things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, excellent, and praiseworthy. If my thoughts don't fall under those categories I will not think them! Anything that reminds me of God, that He has taught me, or I have read about Him, I will imitate until I die. I want my life to look like the life of a disciple, leaving everything behind for His sake. I want to be crazy in love with God in a way that is radical!

I will not sit and think of all the things in this world I wish I had, or how I might wish my circumstances were different. Instead I will be thankful for God has given me much more than I deserve and not only that but I am thankful for hard circumstances that allow God to show me His strength in my weakness.  There are times I have had a lot, and times I have had nothing, but I don't care! I just want more of Him!

Finally!

Well we finally got the phone call yesterday that our homestudy got the signature it needed! Wahoooooo! I got to Bethany as quickly as I could to pick up all seven copies (24 pages each!) of our homestudy and came directly home to gather up all the papers and get them in the mail to Faith International. This is a huge step because next week or the week after our Dossier will get sent off to Ghana for review by the courts!

Then we can do nothing but wait again...and apply like crazy for grants. This week Jeremey's sermon was about waiting, which spoke to me so much on why waiting on things, and answers is so important for our faith. I'm actually thankful for waiting now....I know, weird. You can  watch Jeremey's sermon on spiritual displine here ! It's awesome!

This might sound a little funny to some, but I've been praying for friends for our family that have different colors of skin! Well, all of a sudden in the last few weeks we have met and are becoming closer to several families that are hispanic, african american, japanese, and native american. I am so happy about this because it means that Akwasi can play with their children, and see faces that look a little more like his. God cares so much about the details of our lives, it's amazing.

Hello June!

I can't believe it's June! June means homestudy is going to Ghana (when it finally gets signed!) and camp and the start of summer! So many things for which I am excited about!

Why is it that when I have to wait a week for something it feels like a year? We are still waiting for our homestudy to get the signature it needs....I can imagine one would put off reading something about a family that is 24 pages long but I'm hopeful that maybe today or tomorrow she will feel the need to get it done and over with!

We did manage to score a bunkbed over the weekend for $100 which was nothing short of a miracle! Thanks to some good friends from church who are giving us a loft-bed, we now have the bed situation figured out for when Akwasi arrives! Only things left to procure are a range of boys clothes from 2t-4t (just a few outfits until we know what size he is) and a couple pairs of shoes in different sizes, and a carseat.

This week while I wait I think I will get going on medical POA's for the kids while we are gone, and more grant applications. The kids are getting excited too, and every night have been praying for Akwasi which is so neat to hear them start to understand what is happening. Aubrey on the other hand is in for a rude awakening with no longer being center of attention around here.

God is good and I am enjoying the process even in the wait. He has been taking me through the psalms this week, I can't keep my head out of them. I keep finding ways to sneak off from chores for a minute to read my Bible. It's better than food! I can't live without it! And no, I haven't always felt this away about reading my Bible...I definitely go through times where I forget to read it, put it off, and am otherwise bored by it and fall asleep! (just sayin!) but when I don't feel like reading it I have been asking God to make me hungry for His word. He answers prayers when they line up with His will, and His will is always for us to want to be closer to Him.