The Scoop on our Trip to Ghana

I know I am long overdue in posting a new blog! I am going to try to catch you up to speed without making you get the dreaded red-eye from reading too long of a blog entry online! Let's see....after my last post, we had a scheduled court date for the last week in November. Well, the WEEK before Thanksgiving, we got an email stating that our lawyer in Ghana had a medical condition that needed to be treated in England, so could we make a last minute court hearing on November 23rd? Our response was of course, HECK YES! So in a last minute scramble, we purchased plane tickets, 4 days before leaving the country and minutes after our miracle wire-in from Abba Fund came in giving us just enough money for the tickets plus travel expenses. All of a sudden, while planning, packing, figuring out what to do with our other three children (our childcare plans fell through...), my mom so graciously reminded me of something..., "Ashley, you don't have your entry visas back yet from the embassy." OH CRAP! Just a week prior, I had mailed off our passports to the Ghana Embassy in D.C. to have our entry visas put in them...and they take two weeks! So, here we were waiting on our stinking visas in order to be able to make it to Ghana for a court date in time. We prayed like we have never prayed before. I checked our tracking number with FedEx some ridiculous amount of times a day...think about how many times you check your email or facebook and multiply that by 100.

Wednesday night (November 16) came...and I knew that in order for me to leave to drive the kids to Tennessee to stay with Jeremey's parents I would need to leave on Friday. Still the visas hadn't shipped. At this point we realized if they didn't ship by Thursday we would not being making our court date. We would be waiting an indefinite amount of time for our sick lawyer to come back from England. We clung onto the hope we have in Christ, and prayed for his will and favor. That night at Soul'd Out, one of our amazing parents/leaders, Mike Wilson, had the students gather around us and they all prayed for a miracle. It was about 8:15 p.m. I got home, got the kids in bed, and checked FedEx one last time before hitting the sack. When I fully expected to see the usual, "tracking number not yet found", the page started loading! Our visas shipped from the Ghana embassy at 8:32p.m.!!! Once again, so thankful God's hand at work. This might sound weird, but I am almost getting to the point now where I am not surprised when God pulls through for us at the last minute. I have been praying He would do that over and over for us, so that ALL might see and know that there is a God. That He cares. And He answers prayers. He is worthy of a life lived for Him, worthy of everything I know to give, and not because He does things for us. Just because He is who He is. The blessings are just a bonus for getting to serve Him with our lives.

So I threw together our bags, wrapped up loose ends, picked up the visas Friday morning from FedEx- straight off the truck- on the way out of town with all 3 kids! Jeremey had youth convention that weekend (OF COURSE!) so he flew out of Rapid that Monday and I flew out of Nashville, and we met in Minneapolis on one of our layovers. =)

We got to Ghana (nearly 22 hours later) and when we got off the plane we were the only white people to be seen, walked into 95 degree heat, and a non-air conditioned, dirty, crowded airport. We got our luggage and managed to find our guide, Boat. (Have you ever tried to find a black man you have never met before in a sea of black faces while having jet-lag?....yeah, that was interesting.) He walked us to the taxi (after being stopped and questioned by police trying to get out the door of the aiport. I still don't know what they were asking him) and as we climbed in the backseat of the taxi, there he sat. This child we have waited for since March. This precious boy I have dreamed about for a year, woken up in the middle of the night crying because I wanted to hold him so badly, there he was. In person. Jeremey and I both just looked at him, like you would when you first hold your newborn baby, from his head to his toes in disbelief. He looked at us with big, tired eyes. We found out later he had been in the taxi since very early that morning, before the sun came up and it was 1:00 p.m. when we got in to Accra. At first he seemed unsure, so we got out the peanuts we had saved for him from the plane. And we offered him water. Such a little gesture and he was soon putting his hand on ours, wiggling in to get closer to us. We had a 5 hour car ride to get to know him, so of course the iphone's came out. It wasn't 30 minutes later and he had nearly mastered angry birds. After all of that, he fell asleep in my arms while looking out the window. It was one of those moments I will never forget. The hot wind whipping through the car, all the sights of Ghana, my eyes were so tired but I couldn't close them. Instead I just stared at his precious sleeping face until I couldn't hold them open any longer.  

Over the next week, we had Akwasi with us 24 hours a day and got to really know him. There was so much laughter, and a few tears as we would sometimes look at each other in amazement over God's gift to us of this sweet boy. Akwasi gave us so much more in that week then we could ever give him. He taught me so much about life, being selfless, and how to be a better mom. The only time I can remember such joy and peace is with the birth or arrival of our other children. Just sitting in those moments and enjoying them and really taking it all in, how amazing it is to see a life before you that you just know was destined to be a part of yours. That God planned long before we even thought of having/adopting another child. Akwasi is a Merrill. (legally, yes...and at heart!) We watched him stack toys, with precision. He balanced a jar of peanut butter on his head with ease. He shared his food with us, feeding us with his hands straight to our mouths, sometimes before he even took a bite himself. He played with the water in the bathtub and helped me do laundry...I was handwashing things and next thing I know he is right beside me- scrubbing, rinsing, twisting, and handing me items to be hung. We took him to the beach and watched the waves all day. We could tell by the look on his face that the cool breeze and the waves were just so amazing to him.

While in Cape Coast, we attended court on November 23rd. The judge who granted our adoption and made us his legal parents said to us, "My prayer is that he will grow in your family to be a light to the earth and living water. And that you and I both will thank God one day for this and know that we did this together." I believe with everything inside me that was a prophecy over Akwasi and his life. He will be a light to the earth and living water. God has something incredible planned for his life without question. I feel so humbled to be a part of it.

After court, and waiting on the decree, we left for Kasoa, where Royal Seed Orphanage is. We spent a few days there playing with Akwasi and the other children. Jeremey played soccer with the boys until he could play no more. They hung on him like monkeys on a tree, seriously! At one point I looked over at him and he must have had 7 kids hanging on him or climbing on him or holding his hands. Children have always been drawn to Jeremey, probably because he is so much fun! I sat under the shade of a tree, surrounded by the children as some of them cuddled up to me, wrapped their arms around my neck, and held my hand. I taught them about things like giraffes and clouds and Jesus. They asked me questions about America. They wanted to know if I knew Barack Obama, because he's the greatest...(now that was funny!) The girls played with my hair, and inspected my tattoos. They asked me about my freckles and if I am Akwasi's mom. I will never forget the feeling of their beautiful dark hands in mine and the look of their bright smiles. I felt so at home and I don't know why because I couldn't have been more out of place.

There is so much more I could tell you. But I will save details about Ghana, and the orphanage for later. That is a whole separate post. At the end of our trip (literally the day before we left Ghana) we filed for Akwasi's visa. We were told to expect up to 60 business days for them to process it. So we had to leave him at the orphanage, which was hard but we trust in God to take care of him. Why would we be afraid or worry? He is in the best of hands because the Lord is watching him. Akwasi will get home to us soon, and in God's perfect timing.

I would (AGAIN!) ask for your prayers for a SPEEDY visa process, funding to come in from some miracle donor to cover the plane tickets and travel expenses of about $3500, and safe travels for Jeremey and Akwasi when he goes to bring him home. Please pray for Jeremey and I as we parent Akwasi, that God would give us wisdom and patience as we navigate new territory. Pray for Akwasi to adjust well. Pray for our other children to adjust to the changes well too. We are so thankful for the prayers and support, and selfless giving of financial blessings that have come from our friends, family, and some who don't even know us. To each of you- thank you! God will pour out blessings on you, just as He has us. Merry Christmas!

WHEN HE ANSWERS!

Yesterday was an amazing day, simply put. I can't hardly believe what all happened yesterday, kind of like I need to pinch myself or something and make sure I'm awake! Over the last week or so, we had figured up how much we needed to pay the rest of the agency fees, the country fees, and our plane tickets. I had no idea how we were going to pay for all of it. We have had people ask us recently what we plan on doing, since by now most of them know we are out of resources. Our answer has remained the same, "We don't know, but God knows." or "God funds what He favors." or most recently with God working on my heart I had gotten realllly good at saying, "I hope God waits till the very last minute to pull through for us, just so people KNOW that this is His will for our family, and it gives Him that much more glory."

Believe me when I tell you, sometimes I say things like that asking myself, "do I really believe that?!"

Well once again, after prayers of HUGE faith, God has answered.

Our children, Rosie (5), Grayden (5) and Aubrey (2) have prayed these big prayers with us. Every night at bedtime, at least one of them prays prayers like this....
"God, please give us the money to bring Akwasi home."
"Thank you God, that I have my own bed to sleep in, clothes to wear, and food to eat. Please give Akwasi food to eat today."
"God, please bring Akwasi home to us tomorrow, in Jesus name."
"God, please keep Akwasi safe today"

I have discovered a couple things. Children often have more faith than adults. Not only that, but they know how to pray with faith. They believe God when He answers. A big family isn't robbing them of anything, and neither is having to get used to disrupted birth order, a person of another "color" in our home, not being able to do ballet or hockey or have fancy toys...they are learning to be selfless, to love without holding back, to sacrifice one thing for something more important. We are very  honest with them about money, where it comes from, and where it goes. They know that we have been praying for God's provision for this adoption, and that means we all make sacrifices. They are happy hearted and full of joy to make them about 99% of the time, honestly as much or more than I am!

Yesterday we received an email that we have received an interest free loan to complete our adoption. The details of where it came from and how much it is for will come when I get permission =) But I will tell you this. It was EXACTLY enough to pay ALL of our agency fees, country fees, and our plane tickets to Ghana for this first trip.

We didn't even know we were both going on a "first trip" until 5 hours AFTER receiving the email about the loan. We thought that we would both be going on one trip, and that would be at the very end of the adoption process. Now, we must both go to appear in court, and Jeremey will go to pick up Akwasi and bring him home 1-2 months after court. God provided BEFORE the need even arose, and we didn't have a clue! Yesterday we were informed that we may be traveling, both of us, to Ghana by Thanksgiving for court! I can think of NO BETTER WAY to celebrate being thankful!!!!!  We are awaiting confirmation of a court date....

The kids and I (since we were the ones home at the time of receiving the news while Jeremey was in staff meeting at church) cried together, got down on our knees, and thanked God together. They were overjoyed that God once again put money in our "Akwasi money jar" as they call it when they point to the jar of change on top of the fridge.

I don't know why God chooses to continue to pour out his faithfulness on us, when we have so many faults and struggles. We are soooo far from perfect, yet He continues to pour out blessings on us that we cannot even fathom. Maybe that's what makes it so amazing. Despite ourselves, God still loves us. And He loves children so much that He will move the biggest mountain for them.

I cannot even hardly wrap my mind around the fact that I am organizing packing lists, making childcare arrangements, going to pick up donations for the orphanage, picking up malaria pills and antibiotics, and most of all GOING to get to FINALLY wrap my arms around our youngest son. AMAZING.

Coming Out of the Desert with My Head Up!

I really am amazed.
Amazed at how God works.
Here for months I have been praying,
wondering, hoping, wishing, waiting,
praying some more....at times wanting to just
totally.give.up.

In Exodus 13 when Pharaoh let the people go,
God did not take them the shortest route through to the Promised Land.
Instead he took them the long way.
So that they wouldn't go back.

This is funny to me because even though the shorter distance might have been more difficult in some aspects,
40 years in the desert wasn't too difficult for them to want to go back?
They kept going. Even when their faith wavered,
when they complained,
when God answered time and time again.
The kept going, they didn't go back.

And if they hadn't walked for 40 years through that desert,
 the Promised Land really wouldn't have meant as much to them, would it? 


"So I am willing to endure ANYTHING if it will bring salvation and eternal glory in Christ Jesus to those God has chosen. This is a trustworthy saying: If we die with him, we will LIVE with him. If we ENDURE hardship, we will REIGN with him. If we deny him, he will deny us. If we are unfaithful, HE remains faithful, for he cannot deny who he is." (2 Timothy 2:10-13, emphasis mine)

I'm glad this has been a hard journey. It WILL bring salvation and eternal glory to some along the way, one of those I believe will be Akwasi. I am thankful for a very long walk in the desert, and I now see it.
I see the Promised Land....
It's still far away but it isn't a mirage. It's real. And we are moving towards it, walking side by side with everyone who has helped us get there. So many friends have helped us, and family. I believe God is going to drop it in people's hearts to help us the rest of the way like only He can do.

It's humbling, that kind of feeling you have when you know you can't do something on your own and you have to ask for help. When you have to accept someone's gift because you know how badly you need it, and how much God is going to bless them for it, even though your pride says to say you can't accept it.

In the last 3 days, after doing the Both Hands Project, we have received $2090 in donations.  In the weeks before the project, we received $1300 worth of donations from friends, and another $400 from family. Today we got a letter in the mail that we received a $2500 matching grant from God's Grace Adoption Ministry. When family or friends send tax deductible donations to them referencing our adoption, they will match dollar for dollar up to $2500. We are so thankful for all of this! The donations keep pouring in! God's help has arrived and I am so thankful....there.are.no.words.

One step closer to holding our precious son in our arms. Out of the desert, across the water, to bring home Akwasi Tru.

When There Is Not Enough of Me!

I have been a little overwhelmed lately with life, but as usual I bring this on myself! I have been taking my first college class the last couple weeks (since the last one I took in 2004!) and while I love learning and love class, I am trying to figure out how to add yet another spinning plate to the balancing act. I don't ever want the kids to not get enough of me because of my pursuit to finish my degree so I can finally be a teacher. So I have to get up really early, or go to bed really late, or not have a perfectly kept house. These things are ok with me. I'm just adjusting! Sometimes I crack up at the responsibilities that over the last few years have just managed to make themselves scream at me, "feel sorry for yourself for having to do all this!" and some days I do. But other days, like today, after waking up at 5:30 in the morning to try to work out, take a shower and squeeze in some homework before the morning chaos began, I remind myself what a joy my life is. These precious little ones running around the house, making noise and silly games out of everything. There is nothing like it. I am blessed to sit under a roof, and have the opportunity to finish school. These are privileges, not rights. I am so blessed. There won't always be socks and cheerios on the floor, but for now I am choosing JOY in the moment. I stopped everything this morning to scoop Aubrey up in my arms, sing her a song, and read her a book. By the last page I think my eyeballs were literally hanging out of my head, but I was so glad I enjoyed that moment with her. She walked away and said, "mom, I love you TOO much" and then spouted off some random quote about being a super-hero that she heard on super-readers earlier this morning. In between changing a poopy diaper, making the kids breakfast, remembering that I needed coffee, ironing their clothes for school picture day, answering the phone only to tell the telemarketer now is really not a good time!, remembering that I never finished my coffee and oh yeah I never ate breakfast either, making my breakfast, getting school papers ready to go, lunch made, shoes on everyone, and out the door....I realized something. This IS MY LIFE right now as GOD himself has given it to me and I CHOOSE JOY. Where there is not enough of me, there IS enough of Him. I don't know what I'm doing. Half the time I fail. As I write this, there are peas on the kitchen floor from last night's dinner. Oh well, I am choosing to be full of joy instead of mad at those peas.

A surprise for us!

No, we aren't pregnant!

I received the long-awaited phone call on Friday from our adoption agency that the family "before" us (in the intangible cue) was able to receive their adoption decree by power of attorney. What does this mean for us? This means that we can go to court in Ghana, without actually having to go to court in Ghana! So, no 10 day trip for us in September! I am so excited about this for 2 reasons...1) it saves us $3000 on plane tickets and 2) I was really not looking forward to spending a week with Akwasi, only to have to leave him and come home for 6-8 weeks.

Now our tentative schedule, hopefully to happen in November, looks like this:
Saturday- fly in and gain custody of our little boy!!!!! =) !!!!!
Monday- visa interview
Thursday- hopefully receive visa
Saturday or Sunday- get back home with our precious Akwasi in arms =)

What's amazing about all this is that God is doing a miracle! I prayed several months ago for God to miraculously make this a one-trip adoption, even though it's never really been done that way. I didn't want to leave the kids twice, pay airfare twice, all those things. God is so good to answer a prayer of mine that I almost thought was impossible, but remembered Jesus' words

Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, "move from here to there", and it will move. Nothing is impossible for you. (Matthew 17:19-21)

What is the point of praying?

Gotta share this amazing story! I found a prayer journal of mine from 2004. We were living in Iceland, had no children yet, and I was praying for God's will for Jeremey & I's life together to start happening! We had no plans of getting out of the military, or of moving to South Dakota. I prayed in March 2004 that God would open the door one day for Jeremey and I to have a ministry together (in my mind, I was asking for 18 years down the road, when I "knew" Jeremey would be retiring from the Air Force). When I prayed that, I wrote down that God was showing me a picture of a youth group and I didn't understand what that meant.

4 months later, the base we were stationed at closed down. We were given two choices on where we could move. Clovis, New Mexico or Rapid City, South Dakota. Jeremey had to decide on the spot, there was no time to think it over- so he went with his gut feeling and chose South Dakota. Little did we know the Lord's plans for us here. Not 5 years later we are out of the military, and serving God in full time ministry which we STINKIN LOVE! Before you go thinking, aw how cute their life is perfect....there are frustrations! Like the constant attacks from Satan, dude is that getting old! And I kind of feel like Moses when He was telling God, "but I am not a good speaker, why would you send me to talk to Pharoah. Please send someone else!" Except I have said... God, I don't really like people sometimes! They frustrate me! I can hardly deal with myself! Why would you put me in ministry when people drive me nuts?! lol probably to teach me a lesson on how to love people more. That's God for ya.

Even more so, I can feel that God is preparing me for something. I am praying huge prayers of faith, like I did in 2004 and I know I will see them come to fruition. I can't handle 3 kids, or 4 kids, not on my own anyway. But God is with me and He is stretching me, preparing me, working my heart everyday like a piece of clay in his hand until He gets it ready for use. Not that I'm not being used now, but boy do I have a ways to go before I am ready for a new purpose.

When we moved here, I read about Pine Ridge Reservation. My heart felt like it was leaping out of my chest as I read. I told Jeremey, " one day I want to go there, do something for God." He wasn't so excited because of the level of danger and kind of discouraged the idea. I of course, with my stubborn nature, prayed anyway. Fast forward 5 years, and God has ordered our steps and for the first time, my feet landed on the ground in Pine Ridge just a couple weeks ago. The Dream Center has been built. God is doing something, and has been doing something HUGE on Pine Ridge for the last decade, but something new is happening. Prayers are being answered, lives are going to be changed. Jeremey and I are soooo very excited to be forming a coalition of youth pastors who will help make this happen. God is so good.

Another prayer answered- I am going back to college to finish my bachelor's in elementary education. I got Pell Grants (thank you Jesus!) and FAFSA loans to cover the rest- but we were looking at $19,000 of loans. Which didn't thrill me, but I was moving forward. My prayer has been that I will get to teach at a low income school, well come to find out the government has a program where if I work at a low income school for 5 years they will forgive $17,500 of my student loans. WHOA! So for $1500 I am going to finish my degree! Did I mention GOD IS GOOD!? Every single one of the schools on my list (General Beadle, Pine Ridge Elementary, and Black Hills Children's Home) are on the government list for this program.

THAT IS THE POINT OF PRAYING!

Daring to be Extravagant

So I'm reading this book called "Extravagant" here is what it says on the back,
"When we realize just how extravagant and outrageous His love is for us, it unleashes in our hearts and minds an extravagance of devotion that transforms life into an experience previously inconceivable. But that's not all. Our extravagance of devotion prompts further expressions of extravagance from God......All throughout the scriptures, we see that lives of extravagant devotion and surrender to Him captured the heart of God. And they still do."

Here is the challenge:
"Recognize how much He loves you. Offer Him your devotion and whatever resources of time, talents, and treasure you have, so He can bless and multiply them. It may be all you have, that's what makes your gift extravagant." (like the widow who gave her two pennies, all she had to live on.)

Here is what is awesome!!!!
"When you do the simple deed of giving it all to Him, He'll work miracles and touch others through you in a way that will make you eager to see where the cycle takes you next."

~ This has just blown me away because my prayer lately has been this crying out to God, " I don't want to be a mediocre Christian!" I don't want to be luke-warm! I don't want to be held back by any fear, any anxiety, any worry, any worldly distraction from what job God has for me while I am here on earth. What could God do through me if I were totally 100% sold out to doing what He asks, no matter the sacrifice, no matter the cost? With a God as powerful, and omniscient as ours, there is no limit to what He can do! Psalm 14:2 says "the Lord looks down from heaven on all mankind to see if there are any who understand, any who seek God." I want that to be me!

It is chilling to think that many Christians, who think that they are saved, will indeed find out that they never knew the Lord. The Lord is clear about this in His word, and I had to ask myself the last week or so, how do I know that isn't me?! In Matthew 25 God separates the sheep from the goats, and for those "christians" who even did miracles in his name, they will not have an eternal reward because they turned a blind eye to those who were poor, thirsty, hungry, naked and had no shelter. Is God really saying what I think he is saying here? If so, the world is in trouble, and so are christians.

Last night on the news I saw that $136 million dollars was spent throughout the world on the box office premier of the smurf movie. Will we not be called into account for the fact that in one single night of spending we could have ENDED world hunger!?! This is the world we live in and it makes me sick! As long as I have breathe, I will do what I can to change things for someone. To change their circumstances and give them hope. To put water in the hand of someone who is thirsty. God strip me of all that makes me selfish! I dare you to pray that for yourself! What would God ask us to give up? Would we give it up? I know He is showing me TONS that I can give up, and MORE I can give, even though in my feeble mind I have little. To the world, I am wealthy.

 A missionary to China for decades said that when he first became a Christian in his 20's, he asked his pastor what to do next. Since he had been a struggling alcoholic, along with lots of other problems, his pastor didn't know where to start so he sent him home with his Bible and said "read it and do what it says." This brand new christian turned to the story of the rich young ruler, who Jesus told to sell everything he had to come follow him. So that is exactly what this brand new christian did. He sold everything he had, except for a couple pairs of clothes, a backpack, his Bible, and a flashlight. Hearing his story, decades later, he said, "the best thing for me was the fact that there were no mature christians around when I read that story in the Bible. They would have talked me out of it."

New Pictures of Akwasi

It's funny how God knows what we need, and when we need a pick me up. I woke up this morning feeling rather "blah" and just thought today was gonna be one of those days I gotta get through. Well, not an hour later and I received the email I have been waiting on for a couple of weeks, with new pictures of our baby boy. Proverbs 13:12 Says this: "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."

Please pray that we find favor with the Ghanaian court system and that our paperwork is expedited. Please pray for us as we continue to seek God's provision for the remaining $18k+ that we have to come up with in the next 60 days. Please pray for my health- satan has been trying his best to attack my health, I have been struggling with motion sickness, travel anxiety, blood sugar issues, and the list goes on. I am normally so healthy and I know this is just a distraction, I am a conqueror though Christ who gives me strength! We need your prayers! Please pray that Akwasi stays healthy in the orphanage, and safe.

Thank you friends& family for all your support, and your prayers. We have been blown away by God's provision through some of you, and are so humbled to be a part of his AMAZING plans for Akwasi's life and ours.

The Miracle just got sweeter =)

Here's an amazing update for you! The urologist called back last night @ 5:30 and said, "We have cancelled your surgery date because there is  nothing to fix." They are stumped by the enlarged kidney, which shows chronic blockage, yet there is no blockage. I told her that I was certain that I knew what happened- and I told her about the prayer that Jeremey prayed for me the night before the test last week. Rather akwardly and hurriedly, she said, "ok, maam...good luck to you...there is nothing else we can do for you." !!!!

This is an indisputable miracle of God, because in 2007, the CT scan showed a major blockage that needed to be operated on. This isn't the kind of blockage like a kidney stone that just dissolves, it is literally a blockage that has to be surgically fixed, and a stent put in to reopen the closed area. So God healed me without question!

I told the Lord in my journal 2 weeks ago in relation to God's provision for our adoption, and all of life really... " I have tasted and seen, I KNOW what you can do. God, I know you are my father, and even as a father will not give his son a snake when he asks for a fish ( from Matthew 7:10), surely you will answer my prayer. Keep giving me opportunities to trust you so that one day I can tell these stories to the world. You give me life, let me use my life for your glory. I am not afraid!"......."God please answer us! Don't forsake us, Lord! You know our needs, I trust in You and You alone! Plant beautiful trees in this desert, that they may grow and flourish, and all who know us will see that YOU are God! (Isaiah 44) Your hand is what will provide for us and people will put their faith in you. I count our sufferings as gain, even more through these trials will our faith be grown in you, and in turn the faith of those around us.( I will not lose hope! I will not give up! I will keep asking you Lord. Surely God you will look down on us with mercy and move your hand in our circumstances. If you do not, our faith will still grow as we trust in your sovereignty. You know what we need and your very breath has enough power to change our lives forever in a moment. God I present to you my case, I leave it at your feet ( Philippians 4:6) Hear me, Abba Father! You are my Daddy! Some ask for riches, success, for things of this world- God take those things from us but provide for us a way to reach the world for you! To go to Africa. To bring Akwasi home. To teach him about you. Hear my prayer of faith God!"

 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. ⁵ If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. ⁶ But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. ⁷ That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. ⁸ Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do. (James 1:2-7)

My miracle...

After my last update, I received a call from the urologist's nurse after she had reviewed my scan results. Interestingly, my left kidney is only functioning 2% slower than the right! Even more interesting- there is no sign of a major blockage- only enlargement of the kidney which is due to chronic blockage. She said normally this would not merit surgery, because they aren't seeing a major blockage that needs to be removed and opened up with a stent. You mean to tell me that there are signs that it wasn't working, and now it is?! Praise God!

If you don't believe that God does miracles, well....He obviously does! Jeremey prayed for me the night before testing that the blockage would dissolve, that they would do the test and find nothing. I have not had one day of kidney pain since then.

Since it is swollen, the urologist may suggest surgery anyway. He is going to review the test and call me this week with his decision. Either way, I serve a God who Heals!!!! And in case you are thinking, wow God must really love her to heal her like that....let me tell you a secret. I did absolutely NOTHING to deserve His healing. As a matter of fact, I am pretty sinful. I screw up on a regular basis. I frustrate myself with struggling with sin when I know I am free in Christ. But it's because of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit in my life that through prayer, and FAITH in God's power to breathe life into all things, that He heals me. His amazing healing power is available to all believers. Sometimes we just don't ask Him. Ask Him!

Kidney Surgery Update

After some rather not fun testing last week in Sioux Falls, I am schedule for surgery on August 12th. We were hoping that they would be able to fit me in while we were there, but we didn't know there is a 3 to 4 week timeframe afterwards where I can't travel so we had to bump the surgery out until August.  Thankfully, it's laparoscopic, only about 2 hours long, and I should only have to stay in the hospital one night. 

Please pray for the surgery to go smoothly, for them to find what is blocking my kidney from draining and be able to open it up easily, for the stent that will stay in place for 4-6 weeks to miraculously not bother me! My urologist warned me that the stent is very uncomfortable- with 3 kiddos to take care of, I need to feel good! We will have to go back to Sioux Falls in September for the stent to be removed, but this only takes about a minute apparently. Don't know if I have to go under for that one....kinda hope so! lol 

I discovered that I am not the best patient. I pass out at nearly every opportunity. The Lord is my strength! I am thankful He has given us the wisdom of doctors for times we need it, and praying that the surgery is a success. I'm ready to feel better =) God has been good to make it so that while our children were babies, my kidney didn't bother me as much so I was able to put off the surgery for 4 years! After having a radioactive nuclear medicine scan- I was able to see that my kidney is now functioning at what I would guess is between 10-20% of what it should be. Time to do something about it! 

Thank you all for your prayers. Please keep praying for us on the adoption topic! I am so thankful for these trials and circumstances that are stretching my faith! I will go through anything difficult for the glory of God! I don't want to be comfortable, I pray that I never sit it a comfy boat- I always want be walking on water! 

T Shirts for sale!

A dear friend that I met through God's unquestionable appointment, has blessed our family with T-shirts to raise money for our adoption. They brought home their beautiful girl from Ethiopia 5 months ago, and had these shirts leftover from their fundraising efforts. I was brought to tears by her generosity and I am so thankful! Look to the right to see the front and back of the shirts ------>

If you would like to purchase a T-shirt to help support our adoption, they are $20 for youth and adult sizes, and $16 for baby and toddler sizes. Until I figure out how to do the paypal link on here, you can place orders by emailing me at merrillsmovin4him@yahoo.com or go to my friends blog HERE to place your order. She has the sizes and colors that are available listed.

If you do not see the color/size you would like, please let me know as I am taking orders to make a new batch. Thank you!

off we go

We are headed out tomorrow to Sioux Falls for my kidney surgery. Kinda bummed about having to leave the kids, and having to have surgery but I know that God has us all in his care. Not a major surgery but none the less an overnight stay in the hospital- ick. My consult is tomorrow-Please pray that they are able to schedule my surgery on Thursday, so that we can get back home before the weekend. There is a chance they might not be able to get me in until Monday, which would mean driving back to Rapid, then back to Sioux Falls on Sunday night or Monday morning early. So we are praying for a miraculous opening in their surgery schedule on Thursday! Also please pray for me for quick recovery and for the doctors to be able to find the obstruction easily and for their to be no complications.

Please pray for the kids while we are gone, that they are safe, and have fun. Especially for Aubrey, I have never left her more than one night before so this is really hard for me. She is definitely kind of spoiled with always having Jeremey and I with her, and I don't know how she is going to react to being away from us in a new place for a few days. I am thankful that she will be with close friends of our family, so that should comfort her. Grayden also has a hard time with changes at times, and gets very overwhelmed so please pray that he does ok!

Thank you for all your prayers for us! Today is Jeremey and I's 8 year anniversary! I can't hardly believe it has been 8 years already, and 9 since we graduated high school! Life with him has been so fun and one adventure after the next. We have moved 5 times in 8 years, traveled 4 countries (this fall when we go to Africa will make #5), and the Lord has given us so many other adventures with life and children! I am so thankful for every single thing we have gone through that seemed so hard at the time, but through continuous trusting of God has only grown up our faith in our father! Marriage is a funny thing! There is no doubt in my mind that Jeremey and I will be married for decades, or until God takes us home, whichever comes first =)
I <3 him so much!

Time to pack....and do laundry....and pack!

Some things you just can't shake...

And this book is one of them! I'm reading "Radical: Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream" and I just can't stop thinking about it! It seems that something that keeps coming back in my life, over and over, is this phrase, " God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change, the COURAGE to change the things I can, and the WISDOM to know the difference." I read those words as a little girl at my great grandma kleiman's house on a small stain-glassed plaque that hung in her kitchen window, 20 years later, my gramsie gave it to me and now it sits in my kitchen window, and I read it every day. This is my prayer for my life. My prayer is that I change this world for Christ, because of Him, and for His sake one thing at a time- and that I always have the courage to do it.  I have life, food, shelter, transportation, luxuries that make my stomach churn when I stop and realize that there are BILLIONS in this world who have nothing. Sons and daughters just like our precious children whose parents cannot feed them, and here I sit thinking how nice it would be to have a deck and a fenced in backyard. God forgive our careless, indignant attitude towards the poor, forgive us for justifying our self-indulgence. But don't just forgive us, change us. God's people cannot be the ones who sit back and do nothing while the world waits. Would I really be willing to sell everything I have to give it to the poor as Jesus commands? I don't know about everything,I'm getting there. But I want to be radical. Biblical.

When the forces collide

Nothing feels better then to stand in the face of temptation and to tell Satan to kiss your butt. Romans Chapter 5:3-5 says this:
^3-5There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!


I actually decided today that when things are hard, I feel like I can't do it, life is pressing in on me from all sides. I am thankful! Because through these trials and temptations I will develop some amazing perseverance and character in God, my hope is in Him! So Satan, bring it on cuz you can kiss my butt.


Worth the read: "Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream- RADICAL" by David Platt. Here is a quote from the book that especially got to me! This is about the cost of true discipleship:
"Based on what we have heard from Jesus in the Gospels, we would have to agree that the cost of discipleship is great, But I wonder if the cost of nondiscipleship is even greater.


The price is certainly high for people who don't know Christ and who live in a world where Christians shrink back from self-denying faith and settle into self-indulging faith. While Christians choose to spend their lives fulfilling the American dream instead of giving their lives to proclaiming the kingdom of God, literally billions in need of the gospel remain in the dark."......


"The price of our nondiscipleship is high for those without Christ. It is high also for the poor of this world. Consider the cost when Christians ignore Jesus' commands to sell their possessions and give to the poor and instead choose to spend their resources on better comforts, larger homes, nicer cars, and more stuff. Consider the cost when these Christians gather in churches and choose to spend millions of dollars on nice buildings to drive up to, cushioned chairs to sit in, and endless programs to enjoy for themselves. Consider the cost for the starving multitudes who sit outside the gate of contemporary Christian affluence."


Check out:  notalways.live58.org

Just Life!

Today consisted of gathering papers for grant applications, running errands up to the church and around town, lunch at Culvers with mom and the kids, playing at the playground, a walmart grocery trip (always to be dreaded!) and coming home to cook dinner, play with the kids, clean up the house (again!) and get everybody clean and in bed. Whew, the days are always long but I wish there were more hours in them to get more done. I really need to learn how to become one of those people that gets up at 5 am. I did manage to get two more grant applications done and in the mail today so that my friend was progress! Prayed on the way to walmart for all the things on my mind to include the campers this week, my hubby as he goes to a second week of camp, and of course our Akwasi, across the ocean and waiting on his family. I'm learning how to pray no matter what I'm doing, consistently and fervently! 

I'm so glad mom is here to visit, it is so fun to see the kids get excited over family being here. It is a mix of emotions though because I know she is leaving in a few days. It's getting harder for me to be ok with the kids growing up without grandparents close by. I grew up pretty close to my grandparents and saw them every Sunday at church at the very least. We spent weekends at their house in the summer. I have so many amazing memories of those times. It's kinda funny how as much as family can drive you nuts you would still really like to have them near you!

God reminded me of something this morning. Even when I'm sleeping, God is speaking to me, guiding me along, and I know He isn't going to leave me. 

Psalm 16:5-7

New International Version (NIV)

 ⁵ LORD, you alone are my portion and my cup;
   you make my lot secure.
⁶ The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
   surely I have a delightful inheritance.
⁷ I will praise the LORD, who counsels me;
   even at night my heart instructs me.

When nothing else in life makes sense, I know that God is all I need  and I am so in love with Him!

Waiting Waiting Waiting

Let the 90 day wait for a court date begin! Almost....! Our Dossier is in the hands of the Ghana director who will take it to the Ghanaian court any day now! Time feels like it is going backwards! We have plenty to do while we wait though, because over the next 3 months we need to come up with about $18,000. Yeah I know some of you are thinking, "wow I can't believe she just told us how much they have to come up with", well welcome to the realities of adoption! Let me just say that is only a portion of what we have to come up with total....and a lot of people in this world spend that much on a vehicle and everybody knows it based on what they choose to drive. It ain't no secret! I also have a motive for telling you because I know that God is going to provide in a miraculous way, and when He provides in one year nearly what we make in a year for us to bring home our precious Akwasi, I want GOD alone to receive all the credit! I have seen the fig tree wither (read the book of Matthew!) and I know what God can do! Now I am telling that mountain that stands in the way of us and our son, to HURL itself into the sea. He will do it! I have faith enough that I believe I will see that mountain (for us the mountain is money...or lack of it! ha!) start moving and plummet to the bottom of the depths of the ocean and then the path will be clear!

Meanwhile, while God works, please pray for us! We are applying for grants, and praying like crazy. I have kidney surgery in July (small operation, but still an overnight stay...ick) and I need your prayers for quick amazing healing afterwards and for our kids while we are gone to Sioux Falls for the surgery. God is good, he healed my kidney for several years I have been able to live with a problem that should have been operated on in 2007, but now that our babies are no longer babies, I can get the problem fixed and live completely pain-free (thank you Jesus for doctors and their wisdom at necessary times!).

Please pray for Jeremey at High School camp this week. Pray that God rocks each of the students lives, literally shakes them upside down and makes sense of His Will for each of their lives! Pray that students receive him, get filled with the spirit, get healed, get delivered, and get called into ministry for life. Pray for the leaders, the speaker, the band, and the camp staff.

In my life as of late, I have realized something huge! I always thought my time was my own. Like something that belonged to me and I can do with it what I please. Well...WAKE UP CALL! God spoke to me this week that "MY TIME" is not my time! It's His time that He has given me. Each day I live and move and have breath because of him! So it's not fair for me to be selfish with it. Will I spend more time with God today than I spent in front of the mirror? Will I allow myself to be completely inconvenienced so that I can reach someone, minister to someone, love on someone, when He asks me to? Will I drop what I think is so important to do something for/with my children that He has so richly blessed me with? Will I choose to get up early to bless my husband with breakfast before he walks out the door in the morning? Will I get up in the middle of the night grumbling and complaining over my toddler who still drops her passy and cries for it? I CHOOSE to do all these things with love, with thankfulness, and with a spirit of working my hardest for the Lord who has given me this work to do. I will do it with all my might for HIM. PERSEVERANCE. POWER. PURPOSE. (Bryan Newswanders sermon last night hit on these three points!)

Rainy Sad Day

I am sad today because across the ocean our son is there. Waiting for his family, not even knowing who we are yet, or that we exist. I wonder what he has gotten to eat today, maybe a bowl of rice or beans and yet here we sit with a fridge full of yummy food. I pray he got to drink clean water today, and that he doesn't get hurt or sick, or lice. I hope that someone today was kind to him, and gave him a hug. I want to hug him and hold his tiny dark little hand in mine. I feel like I was born for this, just like I knew I would one day be a mom, I know I was born to be a mom to him. If a white person could have some African in their blood, I must have some in there somewhere. I love the food, the music, the culture. It truly is beautiful. I might not be the perfect mom, I certainly am not the best at figuring out how to discipline...I would much rather just have fun and love on my kids. But I am his mom. And he is our son. Watching the Ugandan orphans last night I could hardly hold back the tears watching them dance and smile, playing their drums. The louder the drums got, the more I had to smile to keep from crying. I got to meet an amazing family who has adopted their precious girl from Ethiopia, and she is the same age as Akwasi. I am so amazed at how God works because they were sitting right behind us. I can't wait to see the two of them play together. I know God's timing is best, and I trust Him.

Philippians 4: in my words

I will not worry about anything, or fret, or lose sleep, because instead I will pray and ask God with a thankful heart for what it is that we need. All things, spiritual and tangible will I lay at His feet and when I leave them there I have peace that no man can understand! In the midst of problems, financial strife, illness, confusion, whatever satan may throw at me, I leave them with God and He settles me down!

I will think on things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, excellent, and praiseworthy. If my thoughts don't fall under those categories I will not think them! Anything that reminds me of God, that He has taught me, or I have read about Him, I will imitate until I die. I want my life to look like the life of a disciple, leaving everything behind for His sake. I want to be crazy in love with God in a way that is radical!

I will not sit and think of all the things in this world I wish I had, or how I might wish my circumstances were different. Instead I will be thankful for God has given me much more than I deserve and not only that but I am thankful for hard circumstances that allow God to show me His strength in my weakness.  There are times I have had a lot, and times I have had nothing, but I don't care! I just want more of Him!

Finally!

Well we finally got the phone call yesterday that our homestudy got the signature it needed! Wahoooooo! I got to Bethany as quickly as I could to pick up all seven copies (24 pages each!) of our homestudy and came directly home to gather up all the papers and get them in the mail to Faith International. This is a huge step because next week or the week after our Dossier will get sent off to Ghana for review by the courts!

Then we can do nothing but wait again...and apply like crazy for grants. This week Jeremey's sermon was about waiting, which spoke to me so much on why waiting on things, and answers is so important for our faith. I'm actually thankful for waiting now....I know, weird. You can  watch Jeremey's sermon on spiritual displine here ! It's awesome!

This might sound a little funny to some, but I've been praying for friends for our family that have different colors of skin! Well, all of a sudden in the last few weeks we have met and are becoming closer to several families that are hispanic, african american, japanese, and native american. I am so happy about this because it means that Akwasi can play with their children, and see faces that look a little more like his. God cares so much about the details of our lives, it's amazing.

Hello June!

I can't believe it's June! June means homestudy is going to Ghana (when it finally gets signed!) and camp and the start of summer! So many things for which I am excited about!

Why is it that when I have to wait a week for something it feels like a year? We are still waiting for our homestudy to get the signature it needs....I can imagine one would put off reading something about a family that is 24 pages long but I'm hopeful that maybe today or tomorrow she will feel the need to get it done and over with!

We did manage to score a bunkbed over the weekend for $100 which was nothing short of a miracle! Thanks to some good friends from church who are giving us a loft-bed, we now have the bed situation figured out for when Akwasi arrives! Only things left to procure are a range of boys clothes from 2t-4t (just a few outfits until we know what size he is) and a couple pairs of shoes in different sizes, and a carseat.

This week while I wait I think I will get going on medical POA's for the kids while we are gone, and more grant applications. The kids are getting excited too, and every night have been praying for Akwasi which is so neat to hear them start to understand what is happening. Aubrey on the other hand is in for a rude awakening with no longer being center of attention around here.

God is good and I am enjoying the process even in the wait. He has been taking me through the psalms this week, I can't keep my head out of them. I keep finding ways to sneak off from chores for a minute to read my Bible. It's better than food! I can't live without it! And no, I haven't always felt this away about reading my Bible...I definitely go through times where I forget to read it, put it off, and am otherwise bored by it and fall asleep! (just sayin!) but when I don't feel like reading it I have been asking God to make me hungry for His word. He answers prayers when they line up with His will, and His will is always for us to want to be closer to Him.

Prayers Please!

Adoption News: We found out Thursday that apparently our homestudy is at the mercy of a supervisor who has to approve it and sign it in order for it to get to be released to us. To make matters worse, she was out of town this week and I get the feeling isn't the best about responding to emails/important matters in a timely manner. Please pray that she gets to it early next week so we can get our homestudy sent to our adoption agency who will send it along with all of our other documents to Ghana. GOOD NEWS: We thought it would take 90 days after submitting our Dossier to get a court date but according to our social worker it may only take a month or two! Amazing!

Happy Birthday Grayden!

I can't believe it that my little boy is turning 5 today! It hardly seems like 5 years ago that we were living in Iceland and our first child, our strong willed boy, was born. At the same time, so much has happened since then it feels like it has been a long 5 years! We measured Grayden this morning, and since March he has grown a whole inch! Being the birthday boy, he got to choose breakfast and of course chose waffles with peanut butter and syrup. Now the kids are hiding under a huge tent in the living room constructed of dining room chairs and about all the sheets and blankets I could find. Gotta love birthdays!

Rain Rain Go Away!

I'm not sure but I think this is day 21 in a row that it has been gray and rainy...I'm starting to feel like I live in Iceland again, and not happy about it! Hopefully the sun will be back out tomorrow! Our homestudy is done, just waiting supervisory approval and our signatures after that and off it goes! Meanwhile Grayden is turning 5 on Friday!!!! So birthday plans are well underway! We are going to do a little family birthday celebration tomorrow and go to Bear Country (IF it's done raining!) and then Friday night have his party with friends. It is hard to believe that its possible he is already turning 5. 5 years ago, in Iceland I had a 22 hour long labor for that child! Phew, what a day that was. Personally I'm quite glad that I don't have to go through childbirth again, I would rather have jetlag to have another child anyday. And I had natural, "easy" births! ha!

I kind of hope that I can come up with something productive to do today with the kids inside. I've exhausted all the baking, coloring, play-doh, beanbag jump wars, movies, and playing with rice that I can.....I've got nothing left! Maybe a trip to the library or something is in order. Wow you can tell I'm bored, isn't this an exciting post!

A Monumental Week!

We should be receiving our homestudy draft at nearly any moment to review and have signed for finalization! This is a huge mile marker in our adoption process because now our Dossier can go to Ghana and we will have nothing else to do but sit and wait for a court date. It is at this point that the ball goes to the other court, so to speak! I am so thrilled that it looks like this week we will be sending that off. Praying for God's supernatural provision, His hand on our circumstances and Akwasi's, and His will for our family. By Faith I will trust Him when all things look impossible.

What Faith Looks Like in my Life

In my life, I find that it can sometimes feel a little mundane. I'm sure you moms know what I'm sayin! Dishes, laundry, clean up the cheerios, the spilled milk, change the diaper, dishes again, laundry again, sweep the floor, scrub the toilet.....kinda like the girl who read, "lather, rinse, repeat" on the shampoo bottle and never stopped the cycle....that's my life! So sometimes I think, "God where is the opportunity for faith?!" and "How am I supposed to keep a good attitude in this mundane existence?" Don't get me wrong, I stinkin' love staying at home with our kids, being a full time mom. Just as I type this Grayden came out of his room after being sent to his room for a time-out for disobedience and said, "Mom, I prayed to God in my room to help me have a better attitude" with a smile on his face. Moments like this make it worth the spilled milk.

Anyway, I have decided that motherhood in itself requires much faith. Everyday I have to ask God to give me more strength, more patience and more wisdom to accomplish the tasks before me and somehow not ruin these precious lives he has put in my care. I want to not only accomplish the tasks, but do it with joy. I have begun to find a deep joy in the mundane, in the dishes and the laundry. While I do them I praise God that I have dishes and laundry to do, because he has blessed us with food to eat and clothes to wear. I just keep taking my thoughts captive every time I want to have a pity party for myself and throwing them out the window, replacing them with thankfulness and doing my work as if I was doing God's laundry =) Ok, admittedly if I was doing God's laundry I would probably iron more than I do now....

The faith to step out and bring a fourth child into our home is stretching, but amazing. I have to crack up at how God asks us to do things that look impossible. Not just having four children, but if this is of God we will know it, because there is no way we could come up with the funds otherwise. Just like any huge task we take on, I know I can't do this without God's help and I am so thankful for the next thing in my life that is going to FORCE me to rely on Him! I hope that my life looks like the lives of people in Hebrews 11. "By Faith, Ashley........" Jeremey preached about this last night and I keep wondering what my line would say?


We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. ⁴ And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. ⁵ And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love." Romans 5:4. 

Another Adventure!

Today I have to laugh at myself for getting all worked up over the last couple weeks over all the things we have going on the next few months. I took the time to pray this morning over them, and one by one, God has begun to answer. I don't understand why sometimes I don't pray first BEFORE I choose to get all worked up!

I suppose I should fill you in a little on what is going on =) We are well underway in the adoption process, homestudy is nearly complete (should be done by Friday!) which is a huge marker in the process because as soon as it is finished it will join all of our other documents in our Dossier and go to Ghana to await approval. When the Ghanaian government approves our Dossier, we will be given a court date at which to appear to receive our adoption decree, as long as the judge grants the adoption.

We received new pictures of our precious little boy yesterday, which was so exciting for us! We have had the same few pictures since March and have been wondering what he looks like now, after 6 months or so has gone by since the first pictures were taken. We even got a picture of him smiling which was so neat to see! He is beautiful, and Jeremey and I both are having the hardest time waiting to hold him. We are just beside ourselves with joy about the thought!

Here he is! His name is Akwasi Amoah, which we will be replacing with Akwasi Merrill. We are still deciding on a middle name....he will be turning three in August =) As far as it depends on us, our adoption is going as quickly as possible. We are told that the normal wait time for approval from Ghana is 90 days from the time the Dossier is submitted. We will be making our first trip around September (if all goes well) to go appear in court, visit the orphanage and get to meet our precious boy! We will stay for approximately 10 days, then come home while we wait 6-8 weeks for the U.S. Embassy in Ghana to approve his visa and clear him for travel to the U.S. I have a feeling that will be a hard 6-8 weeks of waiting!

A little bit about our adoption journey:
We have been talking about adopting again since about a year or so after we brought Rosie home in September of 2006. We always felt that we would adopt from Africa, no particular reason really, just something we felt. And it turned out that we don't qualify for many of the other countries because of our age, number of children, etc. so that kind of settled that!

Last summer we decided to apply to adopt from Ethiopia, so we put in our formal application, and were getting together paperwork when at the same time, Jeremey separated from the military in August. Without having a future job secured, we had to withdraw our application from Ethiopia because of not being able to prove sufficient income. At the time, we were a little discouraged but knew that God had his hand on the process and it must not have been the right time.

Fast forward to this March, in a three week time of prayer and fasting church-wide, we had lots of prayers we were searching for answers on during that time but on the top of the list was God's will for us in adopting again. On the Friday of the last week of the fast, we got an email from a photolisting agency who had just posted a picture and information on an African boy. So out of curiosity, I clicked the link and logged in, which I hadn't done in nearly a year since we had been looking before, and here was this adorable little boy named Akwasi Amoah from Ghana, 2 years old, which was the age we had talked about considering.  I immediately called Jeremey and sent him the information, should I call the agency and ask about him? To which he replied, yes, call them and yes find out more about him and if we qualify for adopting from Ghana. Well, I called the agency and was still holding onto some pessimism because I figured if he had made it onto that photolisting, he probably had some severe special needs of some sort that maybe they hadn't described on the listing. (usually if children are "waiting" children, they have special needs) It turned out that a small cut on his head had gotten infected and bumped him up to the waiting child list. Ok....good news. And we met EVERY single requirement for adopting from Ghana. Ok....wow!

So I called Jeremey back and we decided to pray again and start the paperwork to adopt him. We started the training, and our homestudy process immediately. We are aware that we will meet some challenges, bringing home a 3 year old boy, of a different race, disrupting the birth order of our home. These are all things we had to consider, and pray about our willingness to handle the challenges we may face. But God has been so good to remind us (and specifically remind me because I keep asking!) that we can handle all things through Him who gives us strength and He will equip us along the way just as He always does!

We are thrilled and it becomes more of a reality with every day. Much like when your belly grows while you are pregnant and all of a sudden you realize, "oh my goodness there is going to be another baby joining our family forever soon!" I can't wait to hold him, to welcome him home, and to see all four of our children playing together. What an amazing journey God has given us, that we are so privileged to be a part of.